Water your OWN grass!

Many times we see people and we have no clue as to what is going on in their home, lives etc... but yet as the nature of the covetous beast would have it and begin to rise up its ugly head, thus planting the seed of "maybe the grass is greener on the other side."

So what you are going through a little rough patch in your marriage. Who the heck doesn't? Gone are they days when couples are willing to fight for their marriage, instead, the first sign of test we make a bee-line for the front door and straight to the divorce lawyer. WIMPS I TELL YOU, WIMPS!!!
And then there are those who may not check out physically but mentally they have left the building. No longer functioning in the role that they had committed to but instead giving a second glimpse at Jane's husband or Brady's wife.

"Oh, just look at how Jane's husband always holds her hand when he's walking with her and he always opens the door for her. I wish he was my husband."
Not knowing that a few minutes ago he threatened Jane in the house that he will kill her if she ever forgets to hold his hand in public.

"Man, I wish my wife cooked for me everyday like Brady's wife does and she always looks good even when she's in the house... I wish she was my wife."
Little does he know that every time she cooks for Brady she poisons the meal (the untraceable kind)and the clothes that she rocks so well was bought by the sugar-daddy that provided her with the poison for Brady's meals. Hmmm!

BLOWHORN: "Thou shalt not covet thy neighbour's house, thou shalt not covet thy neighbour's wife, nor his manservant, nor his maidservant, nor his ox, nor his ass, nor any thing that [is] thy neighbour's." Exodus 20:17

The moral of the story is just because your husband forgets to put down the toilet seat, forgets to take out the garbage or leaves his socks in the living room, or just because your wife gained a few pounds after giving birth to your beautiful kids, or her mother has to live with you guys for a while or she doesn't cook everyday... does not mean that they don't love you or that it's time for you to quit them and lust after another! Sometimes we take these little hills of pet-peeves and turn them into unnecessary mountains of no-return.
Granted, every situation may not be the same and there are things that some people will encounter in their marriages that will carry a little more weight than others. This is where maturity kicks in. And as adults whatever choices we make we must be able to face and deal with the consequences that follows.
In any event, our first instinct should not be to covet! Instead let us work on finding solutions.

Let us learn to nurture our relationships the same way we nurture a plant...
1.Select the right soil to plant your marriage on...
2. Water it with words of love, words of encouragement, words of life.
3. Give it sunlight by lifting it up, praising it.
4. Prune it by removing the things that will destroy it like negativity, condescension, blame, undesirable thoughts, lies, doubts, dishonesty, distrust etc.
5. Brace it with like-minded couples, people who will support your marriage, attend counseling sessions and marital classes.
6.Fertilize it with love and sex (lol).

Start doing these things and before you know it you will have the most beautiful GREEN PASTURE ever... your OWN, WELL-WATERED GREEN GRASS!

"... He maketh me to lie down in GREEN PASTURES..." ☺

Till Death do us part,
K & T.

Back to being POLITE!

As husbands and wives it's safe to say that "we sometimes take each other for granted." Even though most times it is not intentional but never the less, it does occur. Remember when you guys started dating each other, how every thing was, "YES PLEASE", "NO THANK YOU", "EXCUSE ME PLEASE", "MAY I", "YOU ARE WELCOME", "GOOD MORNING/AFTERNOON/NIGHT", "HELLO", "HOW ARE YOU" and so forth so on. Well, have you noticed that these common courtesy words have slowly made an exit for the front door? LOL.

We have a reached a common census that the spirit of "familiarity" has somehow eased itself into relationships and have replaced the spirit of "politeness". I think somewhere in our minds we feel that because you are my husband or because you are my wife, you should automatically know that whatever it is I'm requesting from or of you is backed by courtesy. NOT SO!!!

The dictionary defines Courtesy as "excellence of manners or social conduct; polite behavior; respectful, or considerate act or expression."
Not once did it mention gender, color, class or status. So male or female, white or black, rich or poor, happy or sad, married or single... courtesy should be a continuous act. Taking the time to acknowledge the person's prior act of kindness makes the person performing the act more willing and happy to do it.

So going forward, husbands, remember to add "PLEASE" when requesting your wives to hand you the remote or to bring you a glass of lemonade. And wives, when you are asking for the credit cards to do some retail therapy, or needing him to change the baby's diapers... and once these actions are fulfilled, it should be followed by a hearty "THANK YOU." and a genuine "YOU ARE WELCOME". These simple word gestures happen to be very powerful romance tools that leads to a healthy sex-life as well (wink). Remember, it's not always the big things that counts... sometimes the little things makes an even greater impact.

Like our grandparents would say "Manners takes you throughout the world."

Till death do us part,
K & T.

So far... So good!

It's been 262 days since our wedding! WOW! Sometimes we still can't believe that the person of our dream has become our reality.
When we started dating 3 years ago we had no idea that the journey would have been filled with so many wonderful as well as trying moments. But that's the truth about life! Life is filled with the good and the bad... the beautiful and the ugly... the happy and the sad... the ups and the downs... the calm and the storm... but guess what? We wouldn't trade any of it!

This wonderful journey of marriage has taught us so many things thus far.

We are learning...
1. Who we are as individuals and who we are as a couple.
2. How to alter our expectations so that they are realistic and attainable.
3. How to pray together, how to pray individually, how to pray for each other.
4. How to communicate with each other so that the other person understands exactly what we are saying, and not based on our own interpretation or ideology of what we think the other person should perceive it to be (hope we didn't lose you there, lol).
5. How to share our time, energy, space, money, selves etc without losing who we are as individuals and without being overbearing.
6. How to support each others' interests.
7. How to work towards commons goals that will create a solid foundation for our family.
8. How to balance our time as well as how to set aside personal time... away from each other ("me" time is very essential to the growth of your relationship).
9. What it means to respect each other.
10. How to cover each other and have each others' back (ride or die, lol)

This is just a tip of the ice-berg but we plan on expounding on the different lessons in time.

Well guys, we hope you will find our corner beneficial, entertaining, relatable, knowledgeable, helpful and resourceful. Marriage is not easy. It's hard work. And at the end of the day if both parties are willing and ready to PLAY HARD, WORK HARD & FIGHT for each other... then nothing nor anyone can divide what God has joined together! Now let's do this...

Till Death do us Part,
K & T.